Julianne Ryan shares story of sexual abuse

Julianne Ryan is a sexual abuse survivor who spoke up after a controversial letter in the Mandurah Mail sparked outcry this week.

"I was manipulated and told that my parents were okay with what he was doing to me," the artist and CASM Mandurah employee said.

"I spent most of my life telling myself that my abuse was not as bad as other people's because I wasn't raped and so it didn't count.

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"I blamed myself. I hated myself. I harmed myself to find release from the shame and pain."

She said the scars would always be there but she had learned to live with them.

"I have allowed myself, finally, to speak up, to have a voice, to say 'this happened to me'," she said.

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She said speaking up and sharing her story had been a catalyst for her healing but most people in the community still didn't know how to listen when survivors spoke up.

"You write about it and put it online and people are even afraid to comment on things; there is a fear to acknowledge it and talk about it, because it's very uncomfortable," she said.

"That keeps victim silent - and that they don't want to hurt or shame their family for not preventing it.

"But the price of staying silent is that it affects other people who may be supported or helped.

"There is freedom and release in speaking up."

Julianne remembers well the feeling of being silenced as a child.

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As a child of the 70s, society taught her to obey her elders.

"It lead many of us unwittingly into situations of abuse by older men," she said. "As women we are constantly told it's our fault, we asked for it, we shouldn't have put ourselves in 'that' situation, worn 'that' outfit.

"Society says that men must be shielded from women's sexuality in order to prevent them from committing sexual crimes. We see this in comments of blame projected onto women.

"I see the promotion of violence towards women in sexual depictions via advertisements, movies, TV shows. It seems popular to promote women as beautiful and submissive, men as controlling, powerful and successful.

"Why is domination of women promoted as desirable?"

The state government on Wednesday announced a $4 million construction project to expand the accommodation and service capacity of a new women's refuges Mandurah had begun.

Lifeline 13 13 14.