If I ever ask to borrow your car, if I was you I'd say no. A very firm "NO", actually. Oh, I'm a safe driver and all, and I know how to fill up your petrol and I can sort of check the oil when your car starts smoking. I've even finally worked out how to park cars, too.
However, the whole "un-parking" a car thing - that I've never quite got down pat.
Notice how when you do your first driving lesson, the driving instructor already has the car out on the street - not in a driveway. Maybe I'm not alone here.
Yes, if I'm un-parking a car, I still feel like a newbie.
Last week, I was backing out of a supermarket carpark and I had a very closely parked P-plate Holden on one side and a cement pillar on the other. L-platers may be in need of driving confidence, but P-platers have too much!
Anyway, I mused, this is a hard decision: which one am I going to hit? I don't want to hit that pillar, but I don't want to hit the Holden either that has been parked so, so close to me! I don't want to hit the Holden but ... but ... BANG!
Thankfully, I hit the pillar. I think I made the right decision.
I decided a Holden driver clearly has enough problems in their life without me adding to their woes.
Life would be so much easier if we all rode around on those two-wheeled motorised things you ride, standing up, on a platform, called segways.
Speaking of segues, how are we going to pull out of the current lockdown restrictions? Like I pulled out of my parking spot last week, I hope - slowly. But, even that has its dangers.
Now all the states have softened their ways, with even Victoria allowing - among other gifts - five other people in your house. Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews pointed out these five people should be family and friends. Thanks, Scoop!
Who else is going to be in your house, five at a time? Five strangers with crow bars wearing balaclavas this early before the ski season?
Reminds me of a story about Harold - an older man - sneaking back into his house after a very late night out on the turps.
As he bungled his way up the stairs in a drunken stupor his wife shouts out "that better not be you Harold, fumbling up the stairs at this hour, for your sake!"
Harold slurs back: "This ... better be me, fumbling up the stairs at this hour ... for your sake!"
To put my cards on the table, I confess I still belong to that decreasing crowd worried about a second wave of the coronavirus being far worse than the first.
This was the case with other pandemics including the Spanish flu (1918-19) and swine flu (2009).
And yet, I often find myself rooting for the other team of those who want the restrictions lifted.
My late brother Father Kevin Lee said something to me I have never forgotten: "Jesus came to comfort the disturbed and to disturb the comfortable."
With the lockdowns, I have been musing on Kevin's words a lot lately - especially the first part.
If the lockdowns are disturbing people's peace of mind - and you only realise peace of mind is our highest good when it has been taken away from you - then it is enough reason to now ease at least some of the restrictions.
In my humble and fallible opinion, I think local councils should at least take this into consideration when sports teams want to use council facilities.
Yes, I know that the concerns of councils for our safety across the country are probably genuine. And it's all much more than a storm in a teacup.
But sport does so much for people's mental health - both the playing of sport, and the watching of it.
Maybe it's time for us who are OK with the lockdowns to be good sports towards those who aren't OK.
Twitter: @frbrendanelee